(Akiit.com) When you’re facing the death of a loved one, whether it’s a parent, grandparent, spouse or child, you’re more focused on caring for them and ensuring that their needs are all met in whatever time they may have left. This is noble, and most of us wouldn’t have it any other way, but it can take its toll, and if you want to be able to do your best for your loved one, you need to take care of yourself too.
Here are some simple care tips to help you get through what is sure to be one of the toughest times of your life:
Get Help
We are lucky in this country that there is so much great end of life care available to the dying. There are lots of wonderful, caring professionals who are there to take a little piece of our burden and help us to look after our loved ones as best we can, and you know what? There is absolutely nothing wrong with utilizing them, even if only for a few hours each week, so that you can take a break.
Confront Reality
A big regret of many people who’ve experienced caring for a dying loved one is the fact that they did not fully come to terms with the fact at the time. They wish that they had acknowledged the fact their loved one was dying and that they’d been able to talk more about this with their loved one instead of pretending it didn’t happen.
Many of them found that their loved ones wanted to broach the subject, but they just weren’t able to and instead they repressed it, causing them, even more, stress and grief when the inevitable didn’t happen. It might then, be better for you all if you can confront the reality of what is happening and not make it so much of a taboo.
Do Something ‘Fun’
‘Fun?’ You’re probably thinking ‘How can I be expected to have fun when my wonderful mother/father/husband is dying? How insensitive could you possibly get?’ I get this totally, but here’s the thing – you need to let off some steam. If you don’t, you’ll keep bottling things up until you can’t take it anymore and you break down. You’ll fall apart completely, and you’ll buckle under the stress and strain of caring too much and trying too hard.
I’m not saying that you should go to Vegas and live it up or that you should jet off somewhere sunny leaving your loved one in the hands of someone else; all I’m saying is that you should try to take an hour each day or even just a few hours once a week to go to the spa, get your nails done or even just relax with a good book. You’ll feel refreshed and renewed and better able to deal with the challenges of caring for a dying loved one if you do.
These tips might be simple, but they will help you to better look after yourself and your loved one at what is such a tough time for all involved.
Staff Writer; Shelia Day